She Writes Press memoir The Red Kitchen by Barbara Clarke

What author Clarke wants you to know about writing her latest life story

In the lead up to International Women’s Day we are this week taking a close look at Barbara Clarke’s The Red Kitchen published by She Writes Press.

The intimate memoir, due out April 6, depicts change and discovery between mum and daughter — and how it’s never too late to come of age.

Previously Clarke published an indie memoir, Getting to Home: Sojourn in a Perfect House, about the process of building a house as a single woman.

And she has also written for corporate clients, trade magazines, worked under a Robert Wood Johnson Foundation grant, nonprofit organisations, plus local and alternative newspapers.

So let’s find out more about Clarke’s new book, the writing process and her tips for fellow life-story writers …

Starting The Red Kitchen

My new memoir, The Red Kitchen, follows the relationship of my mother and me.

We come of age together, discovering the loving parts of our early relationship and learning to live our best lives.

So all the while, the book details how to live with issues ranging from aging parents, sexuality, and the long-term effects of trauma on women and girls.

I wrote the title chapter in college (1960) and kept losing and finding it over the years.

Firstly I wrote my story as a novel but it kept falling apart.

However, I worked briefly with award-winning author Lucy Ellmann in Scotland via email.

And when I said it was thinly disguised, she suggested writing it as a memoir and to stand on my own with the story that was mine.

At about the same time, I went to a workshop at my local bookstore, Village Books in Bellingham, Washington, on how to write a memoir and why people do.

Certainly that was the ‘aha’ moment for me and I signed up for a nine-month memoir-writing course and finished the book — after more revisions than I want to remember.

Related article – Why write: Why is writing important and why do we write

Your Family Stories System. Father and girl on his shoulders with arms spread wide at the beach.

Finding writing support

My father died many years ago.

My mother lived to 97 and would have loved some chapters of The Red Kitchen and not remembered or appreciated others.

Meanwhile, my brother is not a reader but supportive.

However, my daughters are also supportive. One daughter is an editor and read the manuscript more than once for me.

And the two ex-husbands – well, both nice men but probably won’t enjoy my memories of them, but their names are changed.

My friends who aren’t writers have no idea but “You go girl” is wonderful to hear.

And my friends who are writers understand how much work and belief you have to have in your work and are very supportive.

Lastly, I have two critique partners who have been with me from the beginning — we still meet on Zoom twice a month to share our work.

Indeed they are living my adventure since they are slightly behind me in getting their books published.

The writing process

It took almost three years to complete the first draft, work it in the class with my two critique partners and author Cami Ostman the instructor, then had it developmentally edited, many more revisions-cutting-adding, and sent it off to She Writes Press more than a year ago to be considered.

And then there were still more edits to be made.

Certainly I’m very dedicated to my writing, so the planning was easy.

However, the time each step took in the process was usually much longer than I expected (lots of moving things from one to-do list to another and adjusting my writing plan for the month).

But I happily write almost every day so getting it done was the least of things.

Hardest part of The Red Kitchen

The hardest part for me was writing about my abuse as a child.

And trying to write it well enough so that readers weren’t dragged through yet another depressing memoir.

Indeed I have survived on my sense of humour and wanted to make sure that there was plenty of that in the book — human foibles are often funny.

And finally, after several revisions of The Red Kitchen, I could step back and look at my story and try to make it as universal as possible for readers.

In short, I think that writers, especially new writers, write for themselves.

And the trick is to finally make what you’re writing for your readers and to respect them for what they will bring to the story.

Highlights of The Red Kitchen

The cover – I loved it from the minute I saw it.

And opening a box with 10 advanced readers’ copies of The Red Kitchen.

Certainly that felt so rewarding, real and overwhelming all at once.

Going forward, I hope the book will be of use to readers.

And I would like to have conversations about the subject matter: mothers/daughters, chaotic families and what it takes to emerge as complete as possible, women in the workplace and in the world, working in Kenya, and growing up — finally.

Also to share the message that it is possible to start out as one of those broken eggs in the broken nest and grow, find compassion, and become the person you truly want to be.

Clarke’s tips for new writers

Firstly know why you’re telling your story.

It took me a long time to be able to answer that question and also what The Red Kitchen is about.

So themes and the story arc; patience, dedication, tune out your inner critic — they are not helpful; keep writing and go deeper into the themes of the book; find a good critique partner(s); a good editor; and put plenty of money aside because it’s expensive to be published these days no matter what route you take if you want people to buy the book.

Related article – How to get your own book printed without stressing!

Final Say: The Red Kitchen

It is clear Clarke has been on a journey of self discovery to write this memoir.

And she is excited for its released soon.

However, Clarke’s final word is to support our local bookstores.

“I am fortunate in that I have a wonderful bookstore within walking distance – Village Books in Bellingham, WA. Indie Bound as well,” she said.

“I’m not against Amazon buying but when I see what small independent bookstores have gone through in the last year and into 2021, I want to support them since they are supporting me with a book launch, and make the community a richer place to live.”

Find out more info about Clarke and her writing at https://barbaraclarke.net/.

Happy writing!

*Please note: If you or someone you know is impacted by sexual assault, domestic or family violence contact emergency services. If you are affected by this story and want to seek assistance, see: 1800RESPECT, Kids Help Line, Lifeline, Beyondblue.

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Case study: She Writes Press memoir The Red Kitchen by Barbara Clarke