Case study: Helping my 98yo grandmother write her autobiography

Part 1: A challenging and rewarding journey to record a special life story

It has been a year since I gave my grandma Bonnie the very first copy of her life story.

Certainly it’s a book that is close to her heart – a labour of love.

And given we marked St Valentine’s Day earlier this week, I thought it would be timely to look back on how I got started helping my grandmother write her autobiography.

Indeed, through this project I learnt much about this wonderful lady.

However, I also discovered much about planning and creating a life story.

So keep reading to find out more about Part 1 (see Part 2 and Part 3) and how you can sit down and create a similar family project …

Meant to be

It took me a few false starts to help my grandmother write her autobiography.

Indeed for years we regularly caught up for chats on the phone and she always had many stories to share.

Certainly I would often make notes about her memories after these long talks but they were always sketchy jottings.

So when I was on maternity leave with my second baby at the start of 2017 I decided (amid sleep deprivation!) it was a good time to get serious about recording her life story.

Firstly I tried posting Bonnie questions on a set topic (ancestors, early memories, primary school, etc).

Because she loved doing crosswords daily I thought maybe she could answer one question each day.

But after a few months and some (gentle!) prompting we hadn’t made much ground.

Your Family Stories System. Father and girl on his shoulders with arms spread wide at the beach.

The turning point of helping my grandmother write her autobiography

Soon I realised that to help my grandmother write her autobiography we needed to change things up and play to our strengths.

Certainly grandma loved a chat so in May we decided on a weekly call.

Therefore I would ring at the agreed time (when my son was taking his nap) and Bonnie would be waiting by the phone, raring to go.

Then she would talk while I recorded and wrote notes.

This was a breakthrough!

Indeed we could easily talk for an hour at a time.

For example exact dates, stories, memories and laughter just flew out of her.

We loved it!

And I couldn’t wait for the next session to hear another installment.

Muddling through

The next step in helping my grandmother write her autobiography was to transcribe the recordings in between our chats.

Firstly I typed a recording word for word and tried to work up sections into a first draft.

However, the recordings kept piling up and it wasn’t long before I started to fall behind.

Next the children got the flu, my husband and I got the flu, we went away on holidays and family came to visit.

In short, life got in the way!

Certainly I felt overwhelmed and losing momentum.

So after about 15 sessions we wrapped up the weekly interviews in August.

Then I kept muddling along, working through the recordings several times a week.

Furthermore I agonised over transcribed sections and did extra research.

Indeed I was taking too long and frustrating myself.

But finally after a few months, I posted grandma a few polished chapters covering the first 25 years of her life.

Power of being present to help my grandmother write her autobiography

Over Christmas my family and I made a two-day drive interstate to be with our extended families.

And during this time, I was able to visit Bonnie and we corrected the first section of the manuscript.

She also pulled out her collections of old photos, which we went through over cups of tea.

Indeed it was a terrific chance to reconnect, chat, laugh and celebrate our shared family history.

However, I was sad to go and wished we lived closer.

Back in the now

With the beginning of the new year, I knew I needed to reassess how I was helping my grandmother write her autobiography.

So I started to transcribe the recordings more quickly.

Indeed this was done raw, with little correcting or editing.

And as the pace increased so did my energy and enthusiasm!

Therefore I continued like this for six weeks, dumping the transcriptions into my computer.

Then, with nearly 50,000 words down, I realised I had a lot to go over!

Next I organised the notes under manuscript chapter headings and subheadings such as places grandma had lived, time periods and interests.

Now I am rewriting, editing, and polishing each section.

Finally I feel like we are moving along the right path.

Indeed the writing is flowing and I’m enjoying the project.

Hopefully I’ll have the next 50 years of chapters ready for Bonnie to review shortly.

Final say: Helping my grandmother write her autobiography

Helping my grandmother write her autobiography was a huge task.

Certainly in Part 1 of the project I had a few false starts, muddled along in sections and wished I could make myself work faster!

But overall, I think we moved in the right direction.

And over time the book came together through Pa r t 2 and Part 3.

Most importantly, however, it was a wonderful experience and privilege to record Bonnie’s memories and stories.

Indeed I didn’t realise there was so much to know about this grand lady who we cherish and love.

Happy writing and happy Valentine’s!

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Have you faced some of the same challenges I have helping my grandmother write her autobiography? I always love hearing from different people. Drop me an email or leave a reply in the comments section at the end of this article.

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First published May 17, 2018: This article has been updated and improved.